I’m Zuma, a working mom and attorney, ready to make a huge lifestyle change. From the outside, it may appear that my life is put together and I have it all. The truth is, though, I am stressed, overwhelmed, overworked, and unhappy with the way my life is going, and I need to address why I feel this way and what I can do about it. At first, I was in search of an escape from the life I felt trapped in, I turned to self-help books and “how to” articles. And let me first say, it didn’t work! In search of a lifestyle I would love, I realized that I have no choice but to rebuild my life and rebuild it right, from the inside out, and create a sanctuary, not an escape. My hope is that this blog can be a platform you can turn to when you know you need a change. Read more below for a little more about me and where I’ve been that led me to write this today.
Having a full-time job and being a full-time mom is always challenging. Finding a balance between that was a constant struggle. I was wrapped up in a whirlwind of getting things done. To avoid slowing myself down pushed my feelings, wants, and needs away. When tired, I drank more coffee. When stressed, I drank wine. When sick, I powered through. But having a lifestyle like this, it was no wonder that I got burned out. It was inevitable. Finally, after landing myself in a hospital from stress, I got to thinking: “This is not a life I ever wanted or deserved. I’ve got only one life!”
But what does a good life look like for me?
I asked myself this question three different times in my life. The first time was when I was a teen, growing up in a patriarch Armenia. I was lying on a green fuzzy couch in my room, just thinking. This was after I had just come home from a camp where I got to meet a group of journalists from different countries. I was mesmerized by the independence, freedom, and adventure I sensed from them, and I decided that when I grow up, I would travel the world and tell stories of people I meet. I was so excited about creating a fascinating life, full of color, and adventure.
Fast forward ten years, I was a married mom of one boy and a brand new immigrant in America. I was with my family all gathered in our tiny apartment living room, deciding what to do to build a career and be able to support a family. I thought about writing but dismissed it as a very impractical idea. Eventually, we settled on our decision that it was best for me to become a lawyer. Someone once suggested that I could always do some writing in my spare time if I wanted to, and I then thought that it may be quite reasonable. Instantly, I was very excited to become a modern American woman, a super mom, doing it all!…
Fast forward another twenty years, I am a mom of two, proud owner of a house, attorney, and a writer. I had done it. With a completed novel in a drawer, a blog, and two published children’s books, I was also very overworked, overstressed, and ended up in a hospital, definitely out of balance.
I look back now and analyze how I got to that place. I can see how, as life continued to go on, my business grew, home responsibilities grew, my priorities slowly shifted from living happily to being focused on getting things done. When my plate was too full, I wasn’t able to recognize that and just kept adding more tasks and activities onto it. But is this the kind of life I ever wanted for myself?!
Unfortunately, it took me a nervous breakdown to realize that I don’t want to live this way anymore, that I want to recover from the stress and pressure, and live the life I would LOVE, life filled with great loves and great endeavors! I want to travel, scope out undiscovered hole-in-the-wall places, make friends, tell people’s stories, and pet their dogs…
Thank you for reading loves, and welcome to my journey of self-discovery. Let’s connect and build a place where we can confide, inspire, and help each other to reach the ultimate goal of a beautiful balanced life.
What does a good life look like to you?